When You Keep Your Mouth Shut.....

This past Thanksgiving I gave myself the daunting task of making sides to go along with the Thanksgiving turkey for dinner. It was daunting because up until then I had only mastered desserts and thanks to Pinterest I was in hoping to become an impressive home chef. I cooked macaroni and cheese, cornbread dressing, pinto beans and some marshmallow topped sweet potato soufflé. I worked hard y’all....and IT WAS DELICIOUS!!!! I was so proud of myself that I immaturely assumed had a natural knack for cooking like a had for baking. I mean....it’s should be that simple right?!?!?

I WISH!!!!!!!!!! My cooking skills took a turn for the worse. The food I’ve cooked since then has been burned, raw, soggy, dry, you name it........everywhere you turn something is wrong. I’ve called everyone I know for help. 

The one person I wish I could call for my current cooking woes is my Grandma Doris. When I moved to North Carolina to go to college, she all too conveniently lived a few streets away which was a sigh of relief for me (and my parents I’m sure). I was more than happy when I walked in her house and something was on the stove. You knew there was a good meal sitting on that stove. You know how some grandmas just add that extra special fattening something to make things so tasty??? That was her for sure....and that’s what I need right about now. The problem is she sadly passed away eight years ago without telling me what those special somethings were. She took those extra special fattening somethings with her. She didn’t get to tell me her personal experiences with cooking. The hacks she learned or the issues to avoid. I’m currently fending for myself. Granted, doing it for myself is ultimately my greatest teacher, but I’m sure I would have found encouragement or would have had a better understanding of what I was getting myself into knowing of her experiences. 

It’s the same for us as a body of believers. The more serious I get about my Christian journey, the more I realize the struggles I have are not only understood, but are often shared with others. I’m learning that many people keep struggles to themselves. They keep their mouths shut. Mind their own business. They hold things in so tightly they sometimes lash out in anger or sometimes rude, stand off-ish, or maybe awkward to other people. It makes the people around them keep their distance. 

Listen, I’m not crazy. In some circumstances you don’t need to share everything with everybody, but in some cases it’s pretty remarkable how talking and confessing the things that bother you or the things you struggle with helps everyone. Not just sharing hard times, but professing how God helped in the process. 

Keeping your mouth shut makes you feel alone in the fight. Struggling with insecurity and lust and comparison isn’t some new trend I discovered. They’re struggles shared by family and friends around me. Thoughts of anxiety and fear of the future, fear of new things and fear of changes didn’t start with me (even though I truly felt like it). What if the experiences from the people around me would have been free to share or would have been real about their own struggles? How God helped them out of similar situations, how God gave them their victories, or even how they still struggle???? At the end of the day, my choices are certainly my own but maybe learning their experiences with God would have made me turn to God sooner or at least know I’m not alone?!?!?!? Kirk Franklin has an amazing song called “The Last Jesus.” Probably the best line in the song says,

It’s easier to say ‘Your help is on the way!’

When I was your help all along...

Instead of telling someone “God will see you through” it’s much more comforting to hear “I understand...” or “I’ve been there...” 

Deuteronomy feels like an amazing example. Moses basically spends his final moments on Earth reminding the next generation what God did for the Israelites. Moses understood struggle, and he wanted to remind them just who was on their side. Many men and women throughout the Bible shared their testimonies of their past and God’s saving grace. However, the same Bible has passages that recall generations that “knew nothing of the Lord.” They had to figure life out for themselves which usually lead them back into captivity and heartache. How did that happen? At some point, somebody stopped sharing.

One of the main purposes of the Bible is to remind us of everything God has done throughout time. In these days, though, it seems like everybody has their life together and when problems come, they follow a certain formula and everything turns around for the better. Maybe there is one...I just believe that sometimes it’s ok to share the special formula of how you got over.....or how you’re still working on it. 

It’s part of the beauty of being peculiarly classic! To share and learn about different struggles and strategies to overcome. We can help each other. After all, Revelation 12:11 says “They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony....” So I see that not only do others benefit by me sharing my stories, but I become free and ultimately overcome my struggles. That promise makes me more willing to share with you.